BackWho you’re talking to dictates what you say. Review our Communication Styles if you haven’t already. And remember: These examples show communication skills, and do not indicate correct or incorrect viewpoints.
Choose the communication style of the person you’re speaking to:
If you hear them say…
“I bet our family gun enthusiast wants teachers to carry guns in school, too.”
👍 Try this…
“I think there are a lot of ways we could make schools safer for kids. I’m happy to talk with you more about it later.”
- Snipers want to get a rise, often in front of others. Offer to have the discussion at a different time, and not in front of an audience.
👎 Avoid this…
“I guess I’ll know who to blame when there’s another school shooting.”
- Don’t use insults to make your point.
If you hear them say…
“Your elite college degree didn’t teach you much about the Constitution, did it?”
👍 Try this…
“Is there a point you’re trying to make?”
- Snipers often aren’t looking for meaningful engagement. Put the ball back in their court.
👎 Avoid this…
“Which Republican gun fanatic did you get your education from?”
- Don’t take the bait and counterattack in kind.
If you hear them say…
“Are you going to get ‘God, guns and country’ tattooed on your arm now?”
👍 Try this…
“You know how I feel about needles. Pass the wine, ok?”
- Use humor to disarm your Sniper. If you want to have a serious conversation, follow it up with an invitation to talk in private.
👎 Avoid this…
“Only if you’re getting ‘snowflake’ tattooed on yours.”
- Don’t try to out-Sniper a Sniper.
Additional communication styles...